LeBron James Made The Right Decision. I Just Wish He Would Take His Goons With Him.

Who Knew LeBron James Still Had Teamates That Play For The Cavaliers

Let’s begin…

    So that happened!

    I wasn’t surprised about the outcome of the Miami Heat and Cleveland Cavaliers game Thursday night. LeBron James had a great game in his return to Cleveland. He scored 38 points in the first 3 quarters, as the Heat routed the Cavaliers (He didn’t play the fourth quarter. I think he was busy laughing at the people that thought it would be a good game). That’s what you’re supposed to do when Jamario Moon is guarding you. Moon couldn’t stop a faucet from running, so what makes you think he could stop LeBron James?

    What did surprise me was the way Daniel Gibson, Jawad Williams, and Anderson Varejao treated LeBron. They hugged and joked with him like they were still playing on the same team. Halfway through the first quarter I couldn’t figure out if the crowd was booing LeBron, or the dopes on the Cavs bench. I have never been able to figure out how people have fun getting their ass kicked.

Dan Gilbert (Cavaliers owner) did not return to his seats in the second half. I hope he was in his office doing shots of jack, trying to figure out how to trade LeBron goons. I will personally donate $50 and a bag of Sun Chips towards the effort.

Several times during the second half LeBron taunted the Cavs bench. I was waiting for someone to stand up and do something about it, but they laughed it off, “Oh that’s Bron being Bron. Yeah, he’s kicking our teeth in, but look at all the fun we’re having.” And that’s when it hit me, LeBron James was right to leave.

Occasionally I will run into someone, and as soon as they find out I’m from Cleveland Ohio (My family moved to Florida when I was ten. That means my father was the first to take his talents to Florida.), they ask me what I think about LeBron James. I usually say, “I have no problem with his decision. I would have left as well. My problem is he made it into a television show.” The problem is they can hear the venom in my voice, see my change in posture. I speak for sports fans in Cleveland when I say. LeBron James was more than a small forward for the Cavaliers. He was hope for a city that is desperate to win.

Hope is dangerous to have in sports. It’s something that makes you believe, but when it leaves it can make you hate that you ever had it (For everyone outside of Cleveland, imagine how you felt when Obama was elected. Now imagine the economic downturn afterwards…welcome to Cleveland). Cleveland is a city that has seen their chances at a championship folded, fumbled, and driven away. LeBron “Taking his talents to South Beach” was just another punch to the gut. That’s a punch that 7 million people got to see the results of on Thursday night.

    Now that Miami beat Cleveland everyone wants to know what it means. It means nothing! The Cleveland Cavaliers are a bad team that got embarrassed by a good team. Miami will win in between 45 and 50 games, before they flame out in the second round of the playoffs. The Heat will not be a championship team until they make a decision at point guard and obtain a strong inside presence. Speaking of an inside presence, where the hell was Eric Dampier? I thought he was the second coming. The guy that was going to help the Heat win the 7 championships LeBron promised. I guess sometime after they signed him and before the Thursday night, the Heat realized, “We signed Eric Dampier? The same Eric Dampier that averaged 5 points and 6 rebounds in the 2006 playoffs…that guy sucks!” (In 2006 the Heat beat the Dallas Mavericks in the NBA Finals. At least Dampier helped Miami win one championship). The Heat will be a true Championship contender in a couple years. By that time it I wonder if Cleveland will have new hope to cling on to.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

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