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The 2011 Eastern Conference Finals, Chicago Bulls vs. Miami Heat


Three of the Best Players Will Be Showcased In Eastern Conference Finals

Let’s begin…

Eastern Conference Finals The Chicago Bulls vs. The Miami Heat

In the Eastern Conference we have the top 2 seeds battling it out for the right to go to the NBA Finals. When this season started I wouldn’t have dreamed of this being a possible scenario (which probably says more about me). However after some injuries and bad trades (shout out to Otis Smith and Danny Ainge) here we are.

Don’t be prisoners of the moment. We have seen Derrick Rose and the Chicago Bulls accomplish great feats throughout the regular season. At one time it was believed that they were the odds on favorite to go to the finals, but as the great Notorious B.I.G. said, “Things Done Changed.” During the post season the Bulls have been proven to be a limited team that does everything right. They’re kind of like a good looking guy with a limited vocabulary. Dude looks good, smells, and has good hygiene, but at the end of the day he going home alone, because he doesn’t have the mouth piece needed to get it done before last call (anyone can get it done after last call. At that point only low hanging fruit is left. You get no points for landing grenades). You can point to the Bulls and they’re defensive intensity, but everybody is playing with intensity at this time of the year. In addition Miami is the best defensive team left in the playoffs. So, Chicago’s two biggest strengths are null.

Now the Bulls definitely have the advantage at point guard. And when I say advantage, I mean it isn’t close. Derrick Rose will embarrass any point on Miami’s roster. Rose probably relishes the opportunity to go up against Mike Bibby. Heck I relish the opportunity to go up against Mike Bibby. Miami should petition the NBA to have the point guard position stricken from NBA rosters, and propose 4 on 4 as an alternative. So everyone would agree that Rose will have his way. Then what?

The Bulls don’t have anybody consistently outside of Rose. Carlos Boozer would be great in this series, but he’s not healthy. So, you’re left with an energetic Joakim Noah, a good player in Luol Deng and a specialist in Kyle Korver. If Miami is smart they will defend Korver and Deng with LeBron and Wade. Bosh will guard Boozer, which is a wash, because Boozer is injured and Bosh is…Bosh. The Bulls are then left with Noah at an advantage at Center. That’s just isn’t enough. You can point at depth as a means to offset this problem, but what happens when LeBron and Wade play 40 minutes…oh yeah they drop 30 on your 7th and 8th men (Depth can be the most overrated thing in the playoffs, especially when the other team’s core is young).

The only way the Miami Heat will lose is if LeBron James and Dwayne Wade have bad games. Those two guys must play great simultaneously for 4 games. The Heat don’t have the margin of error to get by without either of those guys. If the Bulls can somehow find out how to get one of those guys off their game, they will win this series. Now can they do it?

The Bulls problem this series will be offense. Defensively they will be fine. They may even be great, but if they can’t score they will lose (please see the Boston Celtics). This series is summed up perfectly by a friend of mine who said, “If you take away the 3 best players in this series. The Bulls will win this series hands down, because of their depth.” The problem is the 3 best players are playing in this series, and Miami has the best 2.

The Miami Heat win 4 – 1

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

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Posted by on May 14, 2011 in Basketball

 

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Does LeBron James Have The Credibility of A Villain?


The Heat Are The Main Event In The NBA

Let’s begin…

After the Miami Heat paired Dwayne Wade with LeBron James and Chris Bosh this summer, they became the biggest attraction in the NBA. Since then the media has tried to cast the Miami Heat as the bad guys, and LeBron James as the villain of the NBA. Maybe it is the black uniforms, or the fact that LeBron James has worn fangs on his mouth piece (By the way what the hell was that? You have a mouth piece with fangs? Why don’t you just come out and say, “I really miss being in high school, so I decided to dress like one of the cool kids).” I would argue that they have been miscast.

Now I would concede that LeBron hasn’t done anything to quell the idea of him being a villain. He has even been quoted say, “…I’ve kind of accepted this kind of villain role that everyone has placed on me, and I’m OK with it.” He may be okay with being a villain, but is he worthy of the title.

What has LeBron done to be called a villain? The only people he terrorizes are Cavalier fans and anyone who watch that decision show. Villains are supposed to intimidate their opponents. Think about sports villains like Barry Bonds, Mike Tyson, Reggie Miller, and Charles Oakley. They scared people as soon as they walked into the Arena (There are still people scared of Oakley. Shoot, I’m scared of Charles Oakley). Nobody is scared of LeBron. As a matter of fact people like him.

Have you ever seen James before a game? He’s always trying to find an opponent to hug, and high five. He welcomes the crowd with a powder toss, and even showcases a trick shot or two. So, if he were a villain, he would be the one you loved, but didn’t trust. Kind of like Wile E. Coyote. (He’s that guy you can’t stand at work, but you still want him to help you move).

Even if LeBron tries to portray himself as a bad guy, he will never allow himself to be a villain. For the last 10 years James has crafted an image of being the good guy. “The athlete that fans love and every kid wants to be.” What makes anyone thinks he’s going to walk away that? This guy spent a minute and half asking the world, “What should I do?” So why don’t we hold off on giving LeBron James the villain title until further notice.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.twitter.com/kortneyshane

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on January 13, 2011 in Basketball, Sports

 

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Emergency Post: LeBron James Talks Contraction “Child Please”


Should James Stop Talking?

Let’s begin…

At what point is, “I’m just a young kid” no longer a valid excuse for making a bad decision? I think it’s at the age of 25 or whenever you start making adult decisions. Whichever comes first.

I’m just a young kid is LeBron James‘ go to move. More than his step back jumper, or a dunk in traffic. He loves to tell you how young and innocent he is.

In the latest edition of I’m just a kid. James made a comment over the weekend where he supports the idea of contraction, and all-stars teaming up in the NBA (personally I agree with the statement, because of the level of incompetence in certain organizations. Can you say, L.A. Clippers)? He stated that it would be a better league, because teams would be more competitive.

This statement is unpopular because people around the league will lose jobs, and the players union is trying to negotiate a deal with the NBA. The players union wants to get their clients the most money possible. In order to receive that money you have to show that the league is profitable and the players deserve a huge chunk. So, if teams are contracted it shows that teams aren’t profitable, and it hinders the players negotiating power. In conclusion LeBron helped the other team, which isn’t the first time. Please see 2010 playoff Boston game 5.

When LeBron was questioned about his comments he said, “I don’t even know what the word contraction means…” Really…you want me to believe you made it to the age of 26 without knowing the definition of contraction. Come on man. Don’t piss on me and tell me it’s raining because sooner or later I’m going to taste the salt.

If LeBron just came out and said I’m a douche people would respect him more. And if you don’t know what words mean, STOP TALKING. Take a page out of the Michael Jordan Hand Book For P.R. Dummies and say nothing (Jordan never took a stand on anything. You could ask him if Wheaties truly was the breakfast of champions and he’d plead the fifth). Everyday I’m happier he left Cleveland, and took his talents to South beach…another “I’m just a kid” move.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on December 28, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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How D-Wade Wins The East . . .


 

Miami Is In A Predictable Position?

Recently, the “Big 3” took their talents to S. Beach.  So far, not so good.  With the exception of Chris Bosh, it looks like everybody took a step in the negative direction where it matters most.  After their most recent unimpressive victory over Bosh’s old boys the Toronto Raptors, the Heat, projected by idiots across the USA to win 72 games or more, are only 2 games better than .500.

Now, I could go on and on for days about why this is happening, who’s to blame, or who’s not going to have a job by the time Pat Riley can say 2006, but those are all for other blogs.

Nope.  Today, I want to address a simple and egregious statement made by Erik Spoelstra (I don’t care if I spelled it right) and D-Wade, and break down why these two and LBJ MAY be on two, different pages.

After their second loss to the Boston Celtics, both of the Heat vets from last year (Spoelstra and Wade) made the same statement:  “We know we won’t be playing our best b-ball until end of January going into February.”

As the above statement was being said, I think I heard LeBron inside his head saying “well . . . ‘What Should I Do?’ until then???”  However, neither the King, nor I should be surprised.  Why?  Because this is the terrible basketball Miami plays EVERY YEAR! This year isn’t a special exception. I believe this has little to do with special offensive sets that need to be drawn up and much more to do with tradition.  Traditionally, every year, the Miami Heat and Wade don’t play basketball until after the All-Star Break.  Why…because in the Eastern Conference you don’t need to.  Wade beats up on the teams he can, steals a win or three from a playoff contender and then cruise controls it to April/May for the playoffs.

I looked at the records and what I found supported this argument.  All of last year, the Heat had about 9 wins against playoff teams that went to the second-round.  The other times they played these same teams (save the Orlando Magic) they lost.  They had only 23 wins by Feb. 6, 2010, they were 23-27 before they/Wade decided to make the playoffs last year.  All the while, King James had nearly double this amount of wins and his Cavs stood at 43-10 by the same date last year.  So, while James was playing for the best record not just in the East, but in the entire league, on his way to his second MVP.  Flash and company decided to take the easy road.  They beat up on easy wins (see Indiana, N.J., Wash., Golden State, et al.) and didn’t start playing LAST year until February.  Which leads me to believe this year’s late start is more by choice than D-Wade would have a King to believe.  But the proof is in the record. . .

Long story short, LBJ doesn’t take games off and he doesn’t fancy losing often.  No wonder these last two Celtics games he’s just decided to play them into it in the 4th quarter, turning double-digit leads into mere 5 pt. victories for the C’s.  To add insult to injury, they lost AT HOME. LeBron doesn’t even know what that looks like.  He nearly NEVER loses at home.  Only 6 home losses for Bron-Bron last year (including 2 to the C’s in the playoffs).  Further, when he plays, he plays to beat the best.  Why does D-Wade get 23 points combined in both Celtic games, but then avg. high 20’s versus all other opponents?  Is he just having off-days, or is he just not used to actually needing to show up for work before MLK day???

I think this will end-up with LeBron making a brand new Nike commercial in 3 years, similar to Tiger Wood‘s famed commercial of last year, but instead it will be Michael Jordan’s voice asking softly in the background: “Did You Learn Anything?”

 
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Posted by on November 17, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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I Thought We Decided LeBron James Was A Douche?


 

Black America Defends LeBron James?

Let’s begin…

    Umm…did I miss something? Someone in America is defending LeBron James? After the decision I thought everyone agreed he was a Douche. I didn’t know that we had a revote. If the polls are still open, please put me down for ‘still a Douche.”

    There was an article written on ESPN.com, and it focused on how “Black America” is defending LeBron James.

    On a side note I always cringe when I see or hear the term, Black America. That term infers that a group of people agree on thoughts, feelings, and reaction. I hate to break it to the developer of Black America but those people don’t exist. My family is black and we agree on about 2 things. And if we did have the opportunity to agree, we wouldn’t waist our time with LeBron James.

I don’t feel bad for LeBron James. I don’t even channel energy in the direction of James. As a matter fact I haven’t heard anyone (who wasn’t emotional invested in sports) say anything about LeBron. No one outside of Ohio and Florida even cares. This isn’t the O.J case. This is a man with a huge ego that decided to tell the world, he was taking his talents to South Beach. So let’s keep this in perspective.

    My interest was originally sparked in the subject while I was watching ESPN: First Take. They were arguing about this topic. Someone was pro black America people group and someone was passive aggressively against it (that’s just how T.V. works). Jemele Hill (who I like like), said she’s heard black people say, the burning of LeBron’ jersey remind them of the KKK. Really….the KKK? When I saw them burning his jersey I thought. “What is a grown man doing with a jersey? That guy is a dope.” Sports starts change every five years for the most part.

    Sports stars change every five years for the most part. So let’s just ride out this whole South Beach, I’m not a leader, I’m egotistic, and hopefully I can win a championship era.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian (Maybe a writer)

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on September 24, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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“Taking Your Talents to South Beach” Chris Paul Will Make it A Trend


LeBron and Paul Have More Than Frienship in Common

Let’s begin…

So there’s a report out in regard to Chris Paul. According to Chris Broussard, Chris Paul has request a trade from the New Orleans Hornets. Hi preferred destinations are said to be New York, Portland, and Orlando which is said to be a top that list. I think Paul’s request was caused by the decision that the Heat’s small forward made, and it may even reveal why he made the move. He’s said to be “best friends” with Chris Paul (I had to put best friends in parenthesis, because James (used his name) is best friends with everyone. He’s best friends with Dwayne Wade, Chris Bosh, Jay-Z, Donald Trump, Warren Buffet…he’s probably best friends with Mel Brooks (the alcoholic not the comedian). Chris Paul and LeBron (did it again) had conversations about where they would play their respective careers. So, that leads me to believe that they both knew each other was thinking about leaving their respective teams before LeBron (I give up) made his decision. And if you didn’t know that, you’re just not paying attention. So, maybe LeBron made his decision to stay ahead of the curve. Maybe Chris Paul decided to leave now, and exercise his power, after he saw it was possible to pull off. I side with the later. I think players say think about what it would be like to play with another great player, but because of the salary cap they don’t think it will happen. However, this summer that was proved wrong.

    I hope that Chris Paul ends up playing for the Orlando Magic. Now as a Cleveland sports fan I’m a little torn, because I see what James leaving did to a city. At the same time the duty of a true fan is to wish vengeance on a player that doesn’t leave the right way. And what better way to wish vengeance than to hope Chris Paul plays in Orlando. Just imagine LeBron tries to back door his way into a championship, but wait a minute. Chris Paul and Dwight Howard form the Magic 2. Not only are the Magic younger, but the team is better. So you spin this forward 3 years, and Miami hasn’t won a championship. There’s dissension among the Heat, Pat Riley comes back, and Van Gundy is smiling. Imagine the hysteria and the backlash. I can see it right now. LeBron takes an hour out of ESPN, he’s at a Sports Authority in Las Vegas, he donating the money to Hookers, and he says, “This fall I have decided to take my talents to Venice Beach, and play for the L.A. Lakers.”

    This summer things have changed in the NBA. For the last 10 years everyone has been trying to find the next Michael Jordan. “Who’s going to take over?” We’ve been reaching for what the NBA was going to be. “Well now we have arrived at an answer. The NBA is now the league of super powers. Stop looking for the next Michael Jordan, because he won’t be here for another 15 years. Instead embrace the supper teams. For the next 10 years the NBA will be reminiscent to the 70s and 80s. It will become the undisputed number two sport in America, and become must see T.V.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian (Maybe a writer)

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on July 24, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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LeBron James: Free Agency Announcement on ESPN Thursday 9pm ET


ESPN Thursday 9 ET

Let’s begin…

According to ESPN LeBron James will decide his free agency future on National TV. He will announce his decision Thursday on ESPN during a 9pm ESPN Special. No one knows where the announcement will be held, which is important because that could tip James’ hand. But why make a decision so public? I could only come to one reason, humongous ego.

For LeBron’s sake I hope he announces his intent to stay in Cleveland. To make a spectacle of leaving a city that depends on you so much is bad karma. If you decide to move on that fine, but you have to do it the right way. To say James wouldn’t be welcome in the city of Cleveland is an understatement. He will be the most hated entertainer in the history of Cleveland, if he leaves in this fashion. If he does announce his intent to stay in Cleveland, the city will breathe a collective sigh of relief. However what about Miami, Chicago, and New York?

First off Miami won’t miss a beat. They’re happy to keep Dwayne Wade and acquire Chris Bosh. Most of Miami won’t even watch the special, because they have better things to do. The city will not find out were LeBron will play until sometime Saturday morning.

If LeBron passes on the Bulls, their fans will be disappointed… but I think the Statue in front of the United Center will help them get over it. If he decides to go to Chicago, the city will welcome him. There will be great anticipation for his first home game. The whole city will be talking. “What will LeBron do?” “How many points will he score” “This will be great!” Then on their way inside the United Center they’ll see the statue out front…

New York will be pissed if they miss out on LeBron. They were the prohivitive3 favorites to acquire his services for the last 2 years. However it was fumbled away by tanking regular season, bad draft picks, and the ghost of Isaiah. I’m not even going to entertain the idea of LeBron going to New York, because it isn’t going to happen. But hey New York Amare Stoudemire and a lack of defense will save the day.

Thursday July 8th, we will all be witnesses.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian (Maybe a writer)

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on July 7, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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