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2011 NBA Season Lottery Teams Rankings, MVP, and Best Team


The Heat, Lakers, and Thunder Are All Powerhouse Teams

Let’s begin…

NBA Lottery Teams, Power Rankings

The rankings are based on a combination of quality of players, expectations, and how awful the team was. I’m ranking best outcome to worse outcome.

“This is it. Don’t get scared now.”

  1. L.A. Clippers: This was clearly the best lottery team this season. They toyed with the idea of making the playoffs while being just bad enough to make it into the lottery. Couldn’t have done it better myself.
  2. Houston Rockets: This is the arguably the best team in the lottery. They obviously have some holes to fill in the front court, but they have one of the best front offices in the NBA. They will be fine. Look for them to make the playoffs next year.
  3. Milwaukee Bucks: This is a playoff team that caught some bad breaks. Look for them to get back on track next season. “Fear the Dear”
  4. Phoenix Suns: This franchise is in denial. They should have started rebuilding 3 years ago after the Shaq experience. They have to get what they can for Steve Nash and cut bait with Vince Carter as soon as possible. Do it for the kids.
  5. Golden State Warriors: I don’t even know what to call this. I think it’s a basketball team, but I’m not sure what they’re trying to accomplish. I’m not sure they are even trying to win games, but I love this organization, because hands down they have the best fantasy players.
  6. Utah Jazz: After losing their two best players what could you reasonably expect. If you’re a Jazz fan just pray Jimmer Fredette is off the board before the Jazz make their pick.
  7. Minnesota Timberwolves: For the talent this team had they should have won a few more games. At the same time this is Minnesota. I’m not sure they know they still have a basketball team.
  8. Sacramento Kings: Welcome to the best high school team of all time. If John Calipari were a GM this is the team he would put together. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Kings end up having to vacate wins.
  9. Charlotte Bobcats: You changed coaches, traded away your best players, and Michael Jordan is your de facto GM. Other than that things are great.
  10. Washington Wizards: Your team stinks, but at least you have John Wall.
  11. Cleveland Cavaliers: “Damn” Nuff said
  12. Toronto Raptors: I know why this debacle happened, but did you have to wallow in the debacle?
  13. Detroit Pistons: I wanted to put Toronto last, but then I remembered that no one playing for the Pistons likes to organization. So I will jump off the ship with them.

My All NBA Team

C Dwight Howard

PF LaMarcus Aldridge

SF LeBron James

SG Dwyane Wade

PG Derrick Rose

I almost put Kevin Durant at shooting guard because he should be on this list.

2011 MVP

This belongs to Dwight Howard. I don’t want to hear about how Derrick Rose is so great. Look, dude isn’t even top five in the NBA (FYI top five: LeBron James, Dwight Howard, Kobe Bryant, Kevin Durant, and Dirk Nowitzki). Don’t get me wrong he’s a good player, but he is replaceable. On the other hand no one changes the game on both ends of the floor the way Dwight Howard does. He is the most dominate force in the NBA, and the MVP.

Best Team in the NBA

The Los Angeles Lakers are the best team. It may be seen as a copout, but they’re the best. The bottom line is they would be the favorite against every other team in the NBA. They have the best closer in Kobe Bryant, and the best coach in Phil Jackson. The Lakers should win the championship.

Season Synopsis

This has been the best regular season in recent history. I think it can spark another golden age in basketball, and I want to thank LeBron James (you’ll have to excuse me for a moment I just threw up in my mouth). James and the Miami Heat changed the way originations put their teams together. Now thanks to them we have powerhouse teams in big markets (the downside is terrible teams like Toronto ad Cleveland…just threw up in my mouth again).

There are 6 teams that have a legitimate shot at winning a championship. I can’t remember the last time that was the case. Wide open playoffs should make for some excitement.

“It’s Go Time!”

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

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Posted by on April 17, 2011 in Basketball

 

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The Cleveland Cavaliers Send Miami’s Talents Back To South Beach


Cavalier fans say, "Get Out!"

Let’s begin…

The Cleveland Cavaliers beat the Miami Heat last night.

Now I know it’s just one win for a team that is terrible. A team in the Cavaliers that have no chance at the playoff this year, and probably even next year. With that being said, do you think that’s going to stop me from overeating? This post is for Cleveland fans that have been slowly slitting their wrist for the last 3 months. If you’re not a Cavs fan you may want to sit this post out, but thank you for clicking it, because I still get the credit for the hit. I am a Cleveland fan, and ya boy is about to represent.

    The Cavs played nasty last night. They fouled hard and didn’t back down when challenged by Miami (thank you Ryan Hollins for not backing down the Dwyane Wade. You are now my twitter avatar, “You’re Welcome!”). They gave them what I like to call, the Zaza to Garnett treatment. I loved every second of it. The only thing that could have made last night better was post-game tears.

Now I think the Cavaliers should build on this, and become a tough team. The Cavalier organization should make a conscious effort to change their image. They can shed the frontrunner image, and embrace toughness as their mantra. Cleveland like other Midwest cities is tough. It’s full of blue collar, grind it out people. So, why not put a team out on the floor that represents your city. It just seems practical, even the owner is a tough crazy man. As a matter of fact Dan Gilbert should spark the campaign with a letter on the Cavaliers website, “Anyone down for a little Comic Sans?”

As for the Miami Heat, this game was probably an admiration. They are better than the Cavs. However, it was interesting to see their response in a playoff like atmosphere. They seemed disinterested, and a little caught off guard. If I were a Heat fan I would be concerned, because this is another game where Miami got punched and didn’t respond.

Miami is supposed to be gearing up for the playoffs. They should be firing on all cylinders by now, poised to make a title run. However they have yet to solve the problem that has been hanging over them this entire season. They still aren’t executing in the half court consistently.

Playoff basketball is all about half court execution (Unless you’re playing the Dallas Mavericks in 2007). Teams that rely on the fast break don’t win in the playoffs (Please see Mike D’Antoni’s playoff record). So as the playoffs approach Miami has to get their game on point.

With that being said, the Cavs win! It’s a beautiful day in Cleveland. They have officially broken up with their ex-girlfriend. She may have left for someone better, but they have the car and the house. There is only one way to sum up the way the city of Cleveland feels today, “The world is better now because the Heat is losing.” (Courtesy of Dwyane Wade).

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on March 30, 2011 in Basketball, Uncategorized

 

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New York Knicks and Carmelo Are 7-8. What Does It Mean?


The Knicks Look Like The Losers In The Melo Trade

Let’s begin…

“Hey New York! How’s that Melo saves the day thing working out?” I haven’t heard from you’ll lately. I know you’ll were once piece away from winning the championship. So, I’m wondering if Carmelo was that missing piece. Alright I will stop kicking Knicks fans in the groin, and begin my spiel.

Since Carmelo Anthony has left Denver. The Nuggets are 9-4 and the Knicks 7-8 (That’s less than .500 for the kids keeping count at home). Does this mean the Nuggets are better without Anthony? Not necessarily. It’s a small sample size, and it doesn’t indicate what a team truly is. With that being said the stat is an indicator of one important thing.

The fact that the Denver Nuggets are still trending in an upward direction indicates that Carmelo Anthony is not irreplaceable. Carmelo Anthony was overrated (I would like to take this time to say, “I saw this coming”). He is not in the class of LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Kobe Bryant, Kevin Durant, Derrick Rose, Dirk Nowitzki, Dwight Howard, or Deron Williams. He is a great scorer in the NBA, but he’s not someone that can carry a team. To put it in Big Boi terms, “He Ain’t No DJ.”

Now that doesn’t mean you can’t win with Carmelo Anthony. As a matter of fact you should win with Anthony. It means that if you plan on winning a championship (listen up New York. I’m about to drop some knowledge) you better lower your expectations, until you build pieces around him. Once the Knicks compensate for their lack of defensive intensity, they will be primed for a title run. However, that’s not New York’s biggest road block in route to a title. There biggest problems are the Lakers, Miami, Chicago, Oklahoma City, and any team Dwight Howard plays for.

As a Cavs fan I’m envious of Denver Nuggets. They didn’t give themselves the opportunity to get screwed by their superstar in free agency the way Cleveland did. At the same time Nuggets fan could be pissed off at the Cavaliers. If somehow LeBron never leaves Cleveland, then Denver would have had the upper hand on Carmelo, because he wanted the money more than anything. He can say it was about winning, but he wanted that money almost as much as Charlie Sheen wants another rail of blow (I say almost, because I’m not sure anyone wants anything more than Sheen wants blow).

There are now three models of how to unload your superstar in the NBA.

  • South Beach Style: Leave yourself open to the possibility of your franchise players walking when there contract is up.
  • Go Utah on it: Get out in front of the rumors, and trade your superstar a year before their contract is up.
  • Mile High Way: Wait for some team to become desperate and over pay for your superstar.

The Orlando Magic and New Orleans Hornets are paying special attention to these models. Which one will they pick?

 

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on March 21, 2011 in Basketball

 

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NBA Questions…What Are The Miami Heat?


What Are The Heat?

Let’s begin…

    The NBA season is over half way over, and I still have many unanswered questions. Personally I think I have too many unanswered question (did I just write that? I didn’t need to say that twice. I’m a dope).

  • What’s going on with the Miami Heat? It was great watching them lose at the beginning of the season, but now it’s becoming disturbing. Correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t this team supposed to good? I think they were. At least that’s what LeBron told us after the decision when the “Big Hype” stepped through the smoke, like the 87′ Miami Hurricanes. You remember the unveiling when LeBron counted off the Championships, “Not 1, Not 2, Not 3…” Then again maybe he was counting off the number of terrible late game possessions.

    By this time shouldn’t we know what the Miami Heat are? I can’t figure out is their finesse or tough. During close games I don’t even know if their alive. The Heat have time left to address their problems, but it’s getting dangerously close to their carriage turning into a pumpkin. Then again they did sign Mike Bibby, so everything will be alright.

 

  • Since Carmelo Anthony was traded to the New York Knicks, the Denver Nuggets are 5-1. So, is Anthony really that valuable? Now I’m not going to argue that the Nuggets are better without Carmelo Anthony, but I don’t believe they lost anything. With Carmelo the Nuggets had only advanced in the playoff one year out of seven. Call me optimistic, but I believe the Denver could do that without him.

 

  • Is it possible to hold off on nominating Danny Ainge as the King of Basketball? Before Kevin Garnett was gift wrapped to the Celtics, like a tennis bracelet from Jared, Ainge was known as an unsuccessful GM that was on the hot seat. Now four years since the trade the Celtics want you to believe that Danny Ainge has Nostradamus like powers. Now if Kendrick Perkins breaks down, and Jeff Green turns into Scottie Pippen, they would be right. However, there is a better chance that the Celtics capitalized on a small window with aging superstars, and they won’t be able to duplicate in the future. This has happened before, and at that time we overreacted the same way. “Danny Ainge, meet Joe Dumars.”

 

  • Can someone tell me how the San Antonio Spurs keep doing this? Their like a super hero that won’t die. I thought their window was close 3 years ago. There must be something in San Antonio’s water. How else could you explain the fact that their starting center is playing without ACLs. I demand a Federal Grand Jury investigation (Barry Bonds style).

    If the Spurs advance deep into the playoffs, it’s only right that Tony Parker be court mandated to repair his relationship with Eva Longoria. “Come on Tony please do it for the kids!” (Trick love the kids).

  • Is it hypocritical for small market teams like Indiana, Cleveland, and Sacramento to complain about the structure of the NBA? They weren’t complaining when they were the perennial Championship contenders, and Miami, New York, and Boston were at the bottom of the league. This is the way the system works. The only city that should be pissed off is Seattle. Not only did they lose a team that is now a championship contender, but they don’t have a chance of getting another one in the near future. Then again they have the Mariners and Seahawks to help ease the pain.

     

    This has been the greatest NBA regular season since the late 80s when Michael Jordan, Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, and Isiah Thomas were in the league. Many people have said that was the golden age of the NBA. If it was golden then, it’s platinum now.

    The questions surround the NBA has made one most predictable professional sport leagues intriguing. It will only get better with the playoffs starting in a month, and I “Can’t Wait” (Bart Scott style).

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on March 5, 2011 in Basketball

 

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NBA Trade Deadline: Credit LeBron James “The Trend Setter” and What Was Danny Ainge Thinking?


Let’s begin…

    Who would have thought a kid from Akron Ohio would change the landscape of the NBA with a one hour television special (that special could have lasted 2 minutes, but you have to add 58 minutes for Narcissism, Jim Gray, and the statement, “I’m Taking My Talents To South Beach” But hey, he did it for the kids…Trick love the kids). After LeBron James’ decision, there was universal criticism for what he did to the city of Cleveland, and justifiably so. Now I think it’s time to give LeBron James and Dwyane Wade some credit for being visionaries.

When Pat Riley formed the new look Miami Heat this offseason. He put the NBA on notice, and loudly said, “This is how the games, is going to be played.” Players and GMs took notice and the Superstar Trading Spree kicked into high gear. Now 8 months later Carmelo Anthony and Deron Williams are already on the move to another city. Why…because the Nuggets and Jazz didn’t want to end up like the Cavaliers (By the way the New Orleans Hornets and Orlando Magic are on notice). The winners in those trade scenarios were the New Jersey Nets and the New York Knicks, but will their respective moves lead to a championship.

Despite the trades the Knicks and Nets have made, they’re still playing catch up to the Miami Heat. Not only does Miami have two hall of fame players, but they also have a hall of fame coach overlooking basketball operations. That’s something that neither New York nor New Jersey will be able to duplicate anytime in the near future. In addition to that, the new collective bargaining agreement is looming in the horizon. It’s inevitable that the new CBA will have regulations to prevent super teams like the one constructed in Miami. So, “Good luck to the Knicks and Nets, but I’d keep those championship rings on a wish list.”

I planned on stopping my post right here. As a matter of fact I had this written yesterday. I thought I was finish. Until…I woke up and big Baron Davis was on my television screen smiling with his homeless man’s beard. Underneath his picture it read that he was trade to the Cavs. So, I couldn’t resist weighing in on my man B.D. For the amount of money that Davis has stolen over the past 2 years this is justice. He’s always out of shape and would have eaten himself out of the league in Shawn Kemp like fashion, if not for Blake Griffin rejuvenating him. So Blake Griffin shows up this year. Baron embraces him, and even helps him win the dunk contest. Now the Clippers actually have the buzz that owner Donald Sterling wanted when he acquired Baron Davis 2 years ago, and what happens next…Baron and his beard are shipped to Lake Erie for Mo Williams. How pissed are you if you go to bed in L.A. and wake up in Shaker Heights. I mad just thinking about it. Then again I’m a Cavaliers fan so I’ve been pissed since June.

The other trade that caught my attention today was the Boston Celtics sending Kendrick Perkins to the Oklahoma City Thunder for Jeff Green and Nenad Krstic. This is a great trade for Oklahoma City, and if they’re able to resign him, it will make them championship contenders for years to come. So, I know why the Thunder did this, and I applaud them. Now what the hell was Danny Ainge thinking? I’ve never been convinced of his skills as a General Manager, but who thought he would expose himself with a championship on the line? The Celtics are a championship team with Perkins, so why would they trade him for Nenad Krstic. There are only two reasons to excuse this trade. The first reason is that the Celtics believe they can’t resign Kendrick Perkins (he has already turned down a deal from the Celtics this year). The other reason is Ainge still owes Sam Presti for the robber he helped him pull off when he gave him Ray Allen in 2007. Personally I believe they wouldn’t have been able to keep Kendrick Perkins, but under this circumstance, you don’t jeopardize a championship. I never thought I would say this, but the Heat have a great chance to win a championship this year.

Now excuse while I go on EBay and place a bid on a Baron Davis jersey.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

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KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on February 25, 2011 in Basketball

 

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How Significant Is Albert Pujols and His $300 Million


Who Will Show Albert The Money?

Let’s begin…

    So Albert Pujols wants to get paid $300 Million over 10 years, and I don’t blame him. I want $300 Million to play baseball, and I can’t even play. I also think the St. Louis Cardinals would be idiots to sign him for that amount of money.

    Now I’ve hear people say that the Cardinals should do everything in their power to keep Pujols. Really…maybe you have it confused. This isn’t the Cleveland Cavaliers (no disrespect to Cleveland). St. Louis is the biggest baseball city in America. This is the franchise of Ozzie Smith and Bob Gibson. They have 10 World Series Championships. So what makes anyone think they need Albert Pujols? They need Pujols about as much as the Disney Channel needs Lindsay Lohan.

    Now Pujols is a great play, maybe even the best player in baseball, but how significant is he? Among the Major Sports, baseball is one where individuals have the least amount of control. This isn’t basketball where one player can single handedly change a team’s fortune. Think about the best players in recent history. Barry Bonds (who is the greatest player ever, but we can argue that later), Alex Rodriguez, Ken Griffey Jr., and Cal Ripken Jr.; how many championship have they won…two (you can totally move me off of Ripken, but then you would have to take away a championship, and that’s not helping you out). So tell me why Pujols is a must have again.

    It takes a collection of good players to have a great team, and if you give someone $300 million exactly how will you form that team. There are only two teams in baseball that over pay players, and continue to be competitive franchises; The New York Yankees and the Boston Red Sox. Currently both of those teams have over priced first basemen. So if Albert leaves the Cardinals in order to make more money, what are the chances of him winning another championship? I’m going to go with, no chance at all. Because there’s a good chance he’ll wake in a Chicago Cubs uniform for the next 10 years.

    At the end of the day an employee is worth however much they get paid. If Albert Pujols signs a contract for 300 million dollars over 10 years this offseason, two teams are going to be very happy. However, only one of those teams will be happy in 5 years. That team is the St. Louis Cardinals.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

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KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on February 16, 2011 in Baseball, Sports

 

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What No One Is Saying About The Cleveland Cavaliers 25 Game Losing Streak


There Is Nothing But Frustration In Cleveland

Let’s begin…

Now that the Cavaliers have set the record for longest losing streak in NBA history, I think it’s the perfect time to weigh in with some perspective (I didn’t want to talk about it before it happened, because I didn’t want to jinx the streak). For everyone that couldn’t understand why people in Cleveland were crying and burning LeBron‘s jersey after the decision…do you understand now? With that being said, don’t be fooled by what you hear. People talk about how the impact of LeBron is the reason why Cavaliers are losing, and that’s just not completely true. No player in the history of organized basketball is worth 60 wins. It’s easy to dismiss the Cleveland Cavaliers as a team that can’t win without their star player, but let’s examine the whole story.

The Cavs lost the best player in the NBA during free agency. I’m not going to argue that. As a matter of fact I think LeBron should get another MVP this year just for carrying that team for the last 7 years. What many people don’t talk about is that they also lost Delonte West, Zydrunas Ilgauskas, and Shaquille O’Neal during free agency (What? Did I really just throw Zydrunas Ilgauskas in there as a loss? We may disagree with on Ilgauskas, but I think we can all agree that Delonte’s guns will never be replaced). Couple that with injuries to Mo Williams and Anderson Varejao, and you have a team that could lose 25 games in a row. There is only one player currently playing for the Cavaliers that was a starter for the opening game of the 2009 – 2010 season. So it’s just lazy to say LeBron James is main reason why the Cavs are losing.

What’s happening to the Cleveland Cavaliers is extraordinary. I’ve never seen anything like this before. I have absolutely no faith in their ability to win. I would rather bet on a 6 year soccer team, before I bet the Cavs to cover in a parlay. At the same time if you know anything about the Cavaliers this shouldn’t be shocking (that was a dumb statement by me. I don’t know why the average person would know anything about the Cavs. There people in jail that have better things to do). The good thing is I’m a Cleveland fan, so I will break it down for you (Oh it just keeps getting better).

The Cavaliers struggled throughout the early 80s until they landed Brad Daugherty, Mark Price, Ron Harper and Larry Nance in 1986. The Cavs would be competitive for the next 6 years, and even reach the Eastern Conference Finals. When Cleveland’s core begin to age and retire the Cavs started to struggle again. From 1993 – 2003 they would wallow in mediocrity and never win a playoff series. In 2003 Cleveland drafted LeBron James, and we all know what happened after that. The Cavs would become one of the marquee teams in the NBA, and perennial title contender. After a one championship appearance and a decision, the Cavs were broken up. Now the Cavs are in there traditional low period, but how long will it last (This is where I come in. Watch me save the day)?

The Cavs need to finish what the “The Decision” started, and exile the rest of their core to South Beach. Everything incorporated with the LeBron James era needs to be severed, in order to create a new identity. They can start by either trading or buying out Anderson Varejao, Daniel Gibson, and maybe even Mo Williams. I say maybe Mo because he was not a part of Cleveland teams that had playoff success. I also think he would be an asset worth keeping if the Cavs can rebuild fast enough. They also need to sever ties with Anthony Parker and Antawn Jamison. They can wait on Parker, but I think they should trade Jamison now. Dude has about 4 days of Cavalier basketball left in him. I think they could do him and themselves a favor if they let him go. That would leave the Cleveland Cavaliers with a core of J.J. Hickson and Mo Williams. If they couple that with their lottery pick and trade acquisitions, the Cavaliers could be back in the playoffs in 2 years. Will they be title contenders in 6 years? I don’t know. What I do know is they won’t be losing 25 games in a row.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on February 9, 2011 in Basketball

 

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