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“I Apologize”…Dwyane Wade and Kobe Bryant Have Everything In Common


Kobe and D-Wade Look On..."I'm a Dope That Was Lame"

Let’s begin…

As much as I love being right you have to admit when you’re wrong. And I was/am/maybe wrong about Dwyane Wade (still can’t admit it).

Now I’ve always thought the hype that surrounded Dwyane was premature and unwarranted. Granted he was the MVP of the 2006 NBA Finals (what a shot to my argument), but what did he do in the playoffs without Shaquille O’Neal or LeBron James (I will give you time to think)…nothing.

One of the untold stories about Wade’s career is without Shaq and now LeBron James, he’s only been out of the first round of the playoffs one time. This has been one of my main sticking points with Wade (sticking point?? Who do I think I am?). If you’re going to be viewed as the one of the top 3 players in the league, you have to get out of the first round. However, I’ve never looked at the other side of that equation, which would go something like this, “When he does have help he gets the job done.” Now I would admit that perhaps I overlooked this.

Winning is an ability. I’m not sure if it’s a skill, but it is an ability. While it may be easy to dismiss this notion, there is something to be said for winning. Winning is why players become Hall of Famers (please see Robert Horry. By the way I’m looking for a Horry jersey. Somebody hook ya boy up). Winning is one of things we hang over players careers as a means to diminish their accolades (please see Charles Barkley). One of the best examples of winning amplifying a players career is Kobe Bryant (excuse me I have to vomit).

Let’s think about Kobe’s career for a minute with the championships aside. He’s been the MVP, the scoring champion a couple times, and a perennial all-star. Now look at Wade. He’s never been an MVP, but he’s a perennial all-star and has also won a scoring champion. So what’s the difference between Kobe Bryant and Dwyane Wade…nothing (that’s right I said it)? If Kobe Bryant had played with the same teams that Dwyane Wade has played with. The results would be the same. That’s a fact. Without Hall of Fame Players around him, Kobe Bryant made it out of the first round of the playoffs one time (eerily similar to D-Wade). So, if we’re going to hail Bryant as winner guy, the same should be done for Wade.

So I was wrong about Dwyane Wade. He is a great player, and a future Hall of Famer. My only question is can he win without Shaq…Kobe did it.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

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Posted by on May 6, 2011 in Basketball

 

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Kobe Bryant’s Homosexual Slur Highlights One of Sports’ Biggest Problem


Let’s begin…

There’s something stuck in my crawl (crawl? Where is that?). So give me a minute to hop up on my soapbox.

Now I don’t know if you’ll know about what happened with Kobe Bryant. If you haven’t, let me fill you in.

During a game Kobe Bryant was issued a call by a referee that he didn’t agree with. He went into a tirade as all players do after a call they don’t agree with (or after any call if you’re Gary Payton). During Bryant’s tirade he screamed profanity and called the referee a homosexual slur that rhymes with Zagat (use your imagination boys and girls).

I waited to see the backlash surrounding Kobe‘s comments…and I waited and waited…there was nothing. All I heard were people defend Kobe Bryant and dismissing his comment. I even heard someone say (I’m not going to say who it is, but his name rhymes with Chris Webber) that, people are competitive and sometimes things slip. What…”Things slip” really? The lone voice that came out against Kobe was Charles Barkley on the Dan Le Batard Show (Purple Drank). So allow me to align myself with Mr. Barkley by saying, Kobe Bryant’s language was completely unacceptable. Please don’t try to excuse that kind of langue as something that always happens in a competitive arena. When you start using slurs, it’s no longer about competition. You are trying to hurt someone, and degrade them as an individual.

The word that Kobe Bryant used toward the referee was disgusting and abhorrent. There is no place for that use of language. I am shocked that people on sports television, that run their yap for a living, haven’t stood up for what is right. It seems that when the shoe is on the other foot, social activist seize the opportunity to promote themselves (“Paging Al Sharpton, Paging Al Sharpton”). We all know if Kobe was white and he called a referee a Nigger. People would try to kick him out of the country (“Oh here comes all Sharpton”).

Now I’m not saying Kobe’s a bad guy, because I don’t pass personal judgment on people I don’t know. What I will say is the reaction to Bryant’s comment speaks to a bigger problem in the American sports arena. There is a homophobic acceptance in sports, because of the lack of representation of openly homosexual men in American sports. Is this a problem? Yes and no. The lack of openly homosexual males isn’t a problem. People have the right to be whoever they want to be in their life. It’s no one’s duty to let the public in on their personal preferences. However, I do think that fact that sports culture hasn’t evolved into present day society is a problem. We have confronted and somewhat conquered racial inequality in sports. It’s time to address homophobia.

The recent Kobe Bryant comment has brought to fore front a huge problem in sports. I really hope we resolve the issue of homophobia in sports. It only takes one person to start the movement, so pardon me while I get Al Sharpton on the phone. I will tell him Don Imus is on line 2.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on April 19, 2011 in Basketball

 

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Refire The Miami Heat Hype; Can The Orlando Magic Win It All?


Another Christmas, Another LeBron James Win

Let’s begin…

I knew it would happen if Miami beat L.A. on Christmas day. I knew writers would fuel it, because of the easy story line. I thought the Lakers would stop it dead in it’s tracks. What I didn’t know is the Lakers could care less about it.

“It” is the hype machine. Let’s refire it.

The stage was set for the main event on Christmas day. The Miami Heat vs. the L.A. Lakers in the Staples Center, The Heat 3 versus Kobe and the boys. The game started at 5 o’ clock, but I’m still waiting for the Lakers to show up (Maybe there on Isaiah Rider time and they’ll show some time in the second quarter next week). I would like to say the Lakers quit, but that would be giving them too much credit. They just no showed.

I have to give Miami credit. They won the game. They showed up, and dominated. I don’t remember them missing a jump shot. It was like watching Pleasantville (when everyone was black and white…I think I’ll stop with the lame movie references). They didn’t make any detrimental mistakes the entire game, which is surprising because Eric Dampier and Joel Anthony are on the team. I didn’t even know they could catch a basketball. I saw the look in their eyes and they were shocked too. So, big ups to the Heat.

With that being said my opinion on the Heat hasn’t changed. I think they’re top 3 in the Eastern Conference and a championship contender. That opinion isn’t changing until they win something.

The Magic Back To How They Were?

I was somewhat impressed with the Orlando Magic, but more with what they did before the game.

The Magic made two huge trades last week. They brought back Hedo Turkoglu, and acquired Gilbert Arenas. More importantly, they got rid of Vice Carter and Rashard Lewis. Vince Carter has never went to another team, and made it better. He has always made the team worse. (If you don’t believe me look it up). The problem with Vince is he always shrinks on the big stage, milks injuries (By the way he hasn’t played a game since the trade because of…wait for it…a knee injury), and mails in games all the time. He’s, just, puree (A saying I made famous in high school, which means no one but me knows of it). Vince Carter is everything you don’t want in a franchise player.

As for Rashard Lewis, dude is just over paid. If he were making less money he would have stayed in Orlando. At least he gets to go to D.C. It should be easier for him to get his steroids there.

With the trades Orlando made they publicly admitted they made a mistake. They should have paid Hedo (Even though he’s over paid), because of what he was to their team. He was the guy that step up in clutch moments and led the team to the finals. He even made Rashard Lewis look good. Turkoglu has always been big time, even going back to his days in Sacramento. I don’t have much to say about Gilbert. I just hope he doesn’t bring guns in the locker room, or take a dump in someone shoes. So, I give the Magic credit for rectify their mistake.

I think Orland has gotten back to what made them a good team. They have a clear franchise player in Dwight Howard (please see this on Dwight Howard), and a proven clutch performer in Hedo Turkoglu. The fact that they beat Boston says nothing. If you want to dissect it, you could say Rajon Rondo and Kendrick Perkins weren’t playing. You could also say Orlando beat and lost to Boston in the playoffs, so the game proves nothing. What I saw was a group of players that all knew their roles. That’s what got Orlando to the Finals two years ago, and they now have a chance to win a championship.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on December 29, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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Emergency Post: LeBron James Talks Contraction “Child Please”


Should James Stop Talking?

Let’s begin…

At what point is, “I’m just a young kid” no longer a valid excuse for making a bad decision? I think it’s at the age of 25 or whenever you start making adult decisions. Whichever comes first.

I’m just a young kid is LeBron James‘ go to move. More than his step back jumper, or a dunk in traffic. He loves to tell you how young and innocent he is.

In the latest edition of I’m just a kid. James made a comment over the weekend where he supports the idea of contraction, and all-stars teaming up in the NBA (personally I agree with the statement, because of the level of incompetence in certain organizations. Can you say, L.A. Clippers)? He stated that it would be a better league, because teams would be more competitive.

This statement is unpopular because people around the league will lose jobs, and the players union is trying to negotiate a deal with the NBA. The players union wants to get their clients the most money possible. In order to receive that money you have to show that the league is profitable and the players deserve a huge chunk. So, if teams are contracted it shows that teams aren’t profitable, and it hinders the players negotiating power. In conclusion LeBron helped the other team, which isn’t the first time. Please see 2010 playoff Boston game 5.

When LeBron was questioned about his comments he said, “I don’t even know what the word contraction means…” Really…you want me to believe you made it to the age of 26 without knowing the definition of contraction. Come on man. Don’t piss on me and tell me it’s raining because sooner or later I’m going to taste the salt.

If LeBron just came out and said I’m a douche people would respect him more. And if you don’t know what words mean, STOP TALKING. Take a page out of the Michael Jordan Hand Book For P.R. Dummies and say nothing (Jordan never took a stand on anything. You could ask him if Wheaties truly was the breakfast of champions and he’d plead the fifth). Everyday I’m happier he left Cleveland, and took his talents to South beach…another “I’m just a kid” move.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on December 28, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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Christmas Day Basketball, Featuring Juggernauts


Will The Miam Heat Hype Machine Crank Up?

Let’s begin…

I can’t wait for the Christmas, because of the slate of intriguing NBA games. I feel like I’m 7 years old again I might just sleep by the Television and wake up every 15 minutes to see if it’s 11:30 (2:30 east coast time. Allow me to show some love to the west coast here. They have to watch the Seahawks play for goodness sake. Let me throw them a bone). This has been the most exciting NBA regular season since 1995 when Michael Jordan came back to the Chicago Bulls. The NBA has star power, intrigue, and most importantly…juggernauts. If I knew all it took was a decision by LeBron to create this kind of excitement? I would have signed up for it a long time ago. I would have even help scrounge up some kids to beef up that boys’ and girls’ audience.

Now there are plenty of people opposed to the NBA as currently constructed, because of the unwatchable teams at the bottom of the league. If that’s your concern I understand (Shoot I’m a Cleveland Cavaliers‘ fan, so I feel your pain. You couldn’t pay me to watch 82 games of that). This summer I thought this would be bad for the league. Then I realized, “I’m emotionally invested in the NBA during the summer? This is great.” Do you know what’s worse than having 15 unwatchable teams? (You’re not really supposed to think about that question. That’s just a non-rhetorical question that makes me feel like I’m making a groundbreaking point “I’m dropping knowledge”)…having 2 great teams and 25 uncompelling teams that are just okay (please see the NBA 1998 – 2004).

There are 8 NBA juggernauts in this order: Boston Celtics, San Antonio Spurs, L.A. Lakers, Dallas Mavericks, Miami Heat and Orlando Magic (tie), Chicago Bulls, and Oklahoma City Thunder (Feel free to complain). These teams have managed to make the regular season mean something, when it means nothing at all. I would argue out of all professional sports, basketball’s regular season means the least. In the last 10 years only 2 teams have led the regular season in wins and went on to win the championship. So, these Christmas day games are going to be great, but outcome it really doesn’t, unless Miami wins by double digits.

If the Miami Heat beat the L.A. Lakers convincingly; ESPN, VS, and even The Food Network, will re-fire the hype machine. You remember that machine…the one that continues to show the first 30 seconds of the decision, followed by the championship celebration in Miami the next day. It’s been out of order ever since Boston beat Miami for the second time and LeBron accidently bumped his coach on purpose. I don’t expect the out of order sign to come off of that machine. Kobe Bryant and the Los Angeles Lakers will be ready to play. I think Kobe’s been ready to play ever since Miami celebrated their “9 consecutive championships” (They haven’t actually won 9 championships. Just in case some dope is looking that up). This game will be competitive, but the Lakers have too much for the Heat to deal with. Miami will lose this game, and sport networks will actually have to work for a lead story.

Enjoy the games and embrace the juggernauts. Personally I’m going to start taking Benadryl and drinking NyQuil, so I can fall asleep.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on December 24, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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How D-Wade Wins The East . . .


 

Miami Is In A Predictable Position?

Recently, the “Big 3” took their talents to S. Beach.  So far, not so good.  With the exception of Chris Bosh, it looks like everybody took a step in the negative direction where it matters most.  After their most recent unimpressive victory over Bosh’s old boys the Toronto Raptors, the Heat, projected by idiots across the USA to win 72 games or more, are only 2 games better than .500.

Now, I could go on and on for days about why this is happening, who’s to blame, or who’s not going to have a job by the time Pat Riley can say 2006, but those are all for other blogs.

Nope.  Today, I want to address a simple and egregious statement made by Erik Spoelstra (I don’t care if I spelled it right) and D-Wade, and break down why these two and LBJ MAY be on two, different pages.

After their second loss to the Boston Celtics, both of the Heat vets from last year (Spoelstra and Wade) made the same statement:  “We know we won’t be playing our best b-ball until end of January going into February.”

As the above statement was being said, I think I heard LeBron inside his head saying “well . . . ‘What Should I Do?’ until then???”  However, neither the King, nor I should be surprised.  Why?  Because this is the terrible basketball Miami plays EVERY YEAR! This year isn’t a special exception. I believe this has little to do with special offensive sets that need to be drawn up and much more to do with tradition.  Traditionally, every year, the Miami Heat and Wade don’t play basketball until after the All-Star Break.  Why…because in the Eastern Conference you don’t need to.  Wade beats up on the teams he can, steals a win or three from a playoff contender and then cruise controls it to April/May for the playoffs.

I looked at the records and what I found supported this argument.  All of last year, the Heat had about 9 wins against playoff teams that went to the second-round.  The other times they played these same teams (save the Orlando Magic) they lost.  They had only 23 wins by Feb. 6, 2010, they were 23-27 before they/Wade decided to make the playoffs last year.  All the while, King James had nearly double this amount of wins and his Cavs stood at 43-10 by the same date last year.  So, while James was playing for the best record not just in the East, but in the entire league, on his way to his second MVP.  Flash and company decided to take the easy road.  They beat up on easy wins (see Indiana, N.J., Wash., Golden State, et al.) and didn’t start playing LAST year until February.  Which leads me to believe this year’s late start is more by choice than D-Wade would have a King to believe.  But the proof is in the record. . .

Long story short, LBJ doesn’t take games off and he doesn’t fancy losing often.  No wonder these last two Celtics games he’s just decided to play them into it in the 4th quarter, turning double-digit leads into mere 5 pt. victories for the C’s.  To add insult to injury, they lost AT HOME. LeBron doesn’t even know what that looks like.  He nearly NEVER loses at home.  Only 6 home losses for Bron-Bron last year (including 2 to the C’s in the playoffs).  Further, when he plays, he plays to beat the best.  Why does D-Wade get 23 points combined in both Celtic games, but then avg. high 20’s versus all other opponents?  Is he just having off-days, or is he just not used to actually needing to show up for work before MLK day???

I think this will end-up with LeBron making a brand new Nike commercial in 3 years, similar to Tiger Wood‘s famed commercial of last year, but instead it will be Michael Jordan’s voice asking softly in the background: “Did You Learn Anything?”

 
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Posted by on November 17, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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I Thought We Decided LeBron James Was A Douche?


 

Black America Defends LeBron James?

Let’s begin…

    Umm…did I miss something? Someone in America is defending LeBron James? After the decision I thought everyone agreed he was a Douche. I didn’t know that we had a revote. If the polls are still open, please put me down for ‘still a Douche.”

    There was an article written on ESPN.com, and it focused on how “Black America” is defending LeBron James.

    On a side note I always cringe when I see or hear the term, Black America. That term infers that a group of people agree on thoughts, feelings, and reaction. I hate to break it to the developer of Black America but those people don’t exist. My family is black and we agree on about 2 things. And if we did have the opportunity to agree, we wouldn’t waist our time with LeBron James.

I don’t feel bad for LeBron James. I don’t even channel energy in the direction of James. As a matter fact I haven’t heard anyone (who wasn’t emotional invested in sports) say anything about LeBron. No one outside of Ohio and Florida even cares. This isn’t the O.J case. This is a man with a huge ego that decided to tell the world, he was taking his talents to South Beach. So let’s keep this in perspective.

    My interest was originally sparked in the subject while I was watching ESPN: First Take. They were arguing about this topic. Someone was pro black America people group and someone was passive aggressively against it (that’s just how T.V. works). Jemele Hill (who I like like), said she’s heard black people say, the burning of LeBron’ jersey remind them of the KKK. Really….the KKK? When I saw them burning his jersey I thought. “What is a grown man doing with a jersey? That guy is a dope.” Sports starts change every five years for the most part.

    Sports stars change every five years for the most part. So let’s just ride out this whole South Beach, I’m not a leader, I’m egotistic, and hopefully I can win a championship era.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian (Maybe a writer)

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

www.youtube.com/kshanecomedy

KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on September 24, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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