Tag Archives: Vince Lombardi

Emergency Post: “Make Way For Bill Cowher!”

Let’s begin…

Can we please stop with the Bill Cowher mania! He’s a good coach. I repeat, a good coach. He’s not exceptional by any stretch of the imagination. So I can’t figure why everybody is treating him like Vince Lombardi. Cowher is not going to turn around anybody’s franchise. He can get you over the hump if your team is ready to win, but what is that saying. If that’s what you’re looking for save 20 million dollars and higher Barry Switzer (In my opinion Switzer is a better coach than Cowher. That’s right I said it. Now give me time to put the cap back on this banana cognac).

Bill Cowher is going to get a head coaching job (probably in Miami) and he’s going to be over paid (just like 20 other NFL coaches). This doesn’t make him a bad hire (it would be a good hire for certain teams), it just makes him another NFL coach. So let’s stop treating him like the Dali Lama. This is an above average NFL coach trying to get a job. Treat him like Brian Billick, John Gruden, Jason Garrett, Leslie Frazier, and Urban Meyer (That’s right I said it).

Now let me get back to doing something important.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian and Writer

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Posted by on December 23, 2010 in Football, NFL


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The NFL…Boring?

The NFL and Celebrations Should Go Hand and Hand

Let’s begin…

    I know I’m not supposed to say this, but overall the NFL hasn’t been exciting this year. I know people will argue with me and regurgitate the rhetoric of NFL analyst. You’ll try to tell me that the NFL is must watch television, but I don’t see it. Maybe you’re living in the past when the NFL had personalities and fun. However in 2006, fun began to be stripped from the NFL by commissioner Goodell.

In 2006 Roger Goodell was chosen to become commissioner of the NFL. He wasted no time in deciding to make Public Enemy Number One “fun”.

Now I don’t blame him for focusing on behavior in the NFL, because the players were out of their minds. Bill Belichick was stealing opponents’ signals, Pacman Joneswas starting gun fights at strip clubs, and Mike Vick was running a dogfighting ring. So there was a need for someone to come in and establish order. The problem is Goodell wanted to be a first ballot Hall of Fame kill joy (kill joy? Why did I write that? I couldn’t think of anything better), so he couldn’t stop there. Next on the agenda was to ban celebrations.

I have never heard a valid argument as why celebrations should be banned. People talk about the integrity of the game and respecting your opponent. What’s respectful about giving a 20 year old man paralysis? I know the goal is to distract me, but I’ve seen the NFL integrity, and it’s brought to you by Geico. So spare me the Vince Lombardi speech. I think banning celebrations stripped the NFL of the personality that brought people like me to the game. Think about Deion Sanders (who is the best athlete to ever play the game). He wouldn’t be able to step on the field without being fined.

Now I’m not saying the NFL doesn’t have a good product. As a matter of fact they have a great product, and there are still players I like to see. I like watching Michael Vick baffle defenses and Peyton Hillis run over linebackers. The problem is I don’t like watching Peyton Manning (I know I just blasphemed, but Manning is about as exciting as a M. Night Shyamalan film). Couple that with the television networks, which have made a conscious effort to force the Colts down my throat. And you have something that I’m not excited to watch.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian and Writer

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Posted by on November 29, 2010 in Football, NFL


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