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“I Apologize”…Dwyane Wade and Kobe Bryant Have Everything In Common


Kobe and D-Wade Look On..."I'm a Dope That Was Lame"

Let’s begin…

As much as I love being right you have to admit when you’re wrong. And I was/am/maybe wrong about Dwyane Wade (still can’t admit it).

Now I’ve always thought the hype that surrounded Dwyane was premature and unwarranted. Granted he was the MVP of the 2006 NBA Finals (what a shot to my argument), but what did he do in the playoffs without Shaquille O’Neal or LeBron James (I will give you time to think)…nothing.

One of the untold stories about Wade’s career is without Shaq and now LeBron James, he’s only been out of the first round of the playoffs one time. This has been one of my main sticking points with Wade (sticking point?? Who do I think I am?). If you’re going to be viewed as the one of the top 3 players in the league, you have to get out of the first round. However, I’ve never looked at the other side of that equation, which would go something like this, “When he does have help he gets the job done.” Now I would admit that perhaps I overlooked this.

Winning is an ability. I’m not sure if it’s a skill, but it is an ability. While it may be easy to dismiss this notion, there is something to be said for winning. Winning is why players become Hall of Famers (please see Robert Horry. By the way I’m looking for a Horry jersey. Somebody hook ya boy up). Winning is one of things we hang over players careers as a means to diminish their accolades (please see Charles Barkley). One of the best examples of winning amplifying a players career is Kobe Bryant (excuse me I have to vomit).

Let’s think about Kobe’s career for a minute with the championships aside. He’s been the MVP, the scoring champion a couple times, and a perennial all-star. Now look at Wade. He’s never been an MVP, but he’s a perennial all-star and has also won a scoring champion. So what’s the difference between Kobe Bryant and Dwyane Wade…nothing (that’s right I said it)? If Kobe Bryant had played with the same teams that Dwyane Wade has played with. The results would be the same. That’s a fact. Without Hall of Fame Players around him, Kobe Bryant made it out of the first round of the playoffs one time (eerily similar to D-Wade). So, if we’re going to hail Bryant as winner guy, the same should be done for Wade.

So I was wrong about Dwyane Wade. He is a great player, and a future Hall of Famer. My only question is can he win without Shaq…Kobe did it.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

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Posted by on May 6, 2011 in Basketball

 

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The 2011 NBA Playoffs: Western Conference Round 2


Let’s begin…

The L.A. Lakers vs. The Dallas Mavericks

I can’t believe that this will be the first time Kobe Bryant and Dirk Nowitzki will face off in the playoff. One would think with the amount of time these superstars have spent in the same conference they would have locked up before now. However, that’s not the case, but now we will get to see it

Were the Lakers challenged in the last series? Who knows? I don’t think anyone could say with a straight face that they felt L.A. was in danger of losing that series at any point. New Orleans never truly challenged the Lakers. I wouldn’t have cared if the Lakers went down 3-0. I would have still expected them to win the next 4 games. The reason New Orleans won two games is because they have Chris Paul and the Lakers are vulnerable at the point guard position (can we someone please take Derek Fisher out of his athletically challenged misery. Dude ain’t had it for 5 years). However, when push came to shove Kobe defended Paul, the Lakers step up their game slightly, and sent the Hornets home. So there’s nothing to take from that series in relation to this one.

Now Dallas on the other hand had a real fight with the Portland Trailblazers. LaMarcus Aldridge and the Blazers gave Dallas everything they wanted. For years the Mavericks were see as a soft team that didn’t play defense. That however is no longer the case. Tyson Chandler has brought an interior toughness to the Dallas Mavericks that hasn’t been there in the past (by the way anytime Tyson Chandler is seen as the savior, things ha veto be bad). So they are not as soft inside. Now they need to fix that defense (I still can’t shake the image of Brandon Roy torching them in game 4, and dude has no kneecaps. What is Kobe going to do?).

I expect the Lakers to win this series. They just have too much length and skill inside. I think Dallas could be competitive early in games, but they just don’t have enough size.

Lakers win 4 – 2

The Oklahoma City Thunder vs. The Memphis Grizzlies.

With Kendrick Perkins, Oklahoma City has made themselves a formidable team in the playoffs and a potential champion. There is one thing consistently holds them back, and that is the inconsistent play of Russell Westbrook.

On just about every night Westbrook has an advantage against any team the Thunder face. His ability to score at the point guard creates problems for the opposition’s defense. However it creates a problem for his team as well. Winning with a score first point guard is nearly impossible. Now it’s great when Russell’s game is on and he’s hitting shots, because not only is he scoring, he’s distributing. Now if his offense isn’t rolling, he shoot tons of shots (like most shooters do) to try to get his offense on track. That’s a problem especially when you’re playing with Kevin Durant. Look I’m not breaking news here. Kevin Durant should be putting g up at least 20 shots a game if OKC plans on winning this series. And if he doesn’t get those shots it shouldn’t be because of Russell Westbrook.

The Memphis Grizzlies have everyone’s attention. After beating San Antonio in 6 games, the Grizzlies have proved that they belong. When you look at Memphis’s roster, you begin to understand why they are having so much success. Zach Randolph and Marc Gasol are a load in the middle. When you pair that with Mike Conley and their perimeter play, you can see the problems Memphis will pose to Oklahoma.

I really don’t know who’s going to win this series. I will pick Oklahoma City Thunder to advance to the Conference Finals, because I think their better from top to bottom. With that being said, I have absolutely no confidence in my opinion.

Thunder win 4 – 3

Be Sure To Read My Eastern Conference Breakdown

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

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“Derrick Rose is this era’s MJ”…Time For A Reality Check.


Is Rose the MVP?

Let’s begin…

Derrick Rose is the next coming of some Zeus like basketball figure. He’s the greatest ever. “Derrick Rose is this mixture between Michael Jordan and Brock Lesnar. I literally don’t know how you stop him!” Well I’d just let him take jump shots because dude can’t shoot.

Alright let’s come down to reality (For all you with you Rose colored shades on. Reality is the place where the grass is green and the best player in basketball has a jump shot). Before I shred Derrick Rose I want to say he is a great player.

Now contrary to popular belief, Derrick Rose is not the best thing since sliced bread. This, “best player in the league stuff” is garbage. He’s barely even top 10 (Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, Dwight Howard, Dirk Nowitzki, Deron Williams, Chris Paul, Dwyane Wade, and Kevin Durant are all ahead of him). Of course if you’ve been listening to sports radio for the last 4 months you wouldn’t know that. The media is treating Rose like he’s actually won something. The other day I heard someone say, “Rose is the most athletic point guard ever.” Take it Easy. Allow me to introduce you to a guy by the name of Allen Iverson. At Iverson’s size and position, there has never been someone more athletic than him. I would even argue that Steve Nash is a more athletic point guard than Derrick Rose (before you kill me for that statement. Take into account that he was a star soccer and rugby player in high school). So, to call Derrick Rose the most athletic point guard ever is just lazy and asinine.

Derrick Rose is not the MVP of the league. It is well known that he’s is going to win the MVP, but so what (that was very unprofessional. Dock me all the journalist points that I’ve never had). We all watched the games, and he wasn’t the best player. You can say that it’s subjective, but there’s not an argument you can make in favor of Rose winning the MVP over LeBron James or Dwight Howard. The truth of the matter is, there are two reasons he’s going to win the MVP, and neither of them have anything to do with him. First every writer hates what LeBron James did this offseason, and they’re dead set on not rewarding him before the season started. The second reason is every writer hates what LeBron James did this offseason, and they were dead set on not rewarding him before the season started. The problem with that is LeBron isn’t the MVP this year either. So while the media allowed James to hold them emotionally hostage. They missed the true MVP this year (drum roll please), Dwight Howard.

Dwight Howard is the essence of what an MVP is. He’s the best defender (note 3 consecutive defensive players of the year) and he is the best player in the league at his position. Howard is the most irreplaceable player in the NBA. If you look at the drop off from Howard to the next best Center. It is a larger gap than Derrick Rose to the next best point guard. Especially since Rose isn’t the best point guard in the league (for the record I would put Rose 2nd this year behind Chris Paul who is top five in steals and assists. Derrick isn’t top five in any stat category). Dwight’s achievements continue to get overlooked, and I’m not sure why. Now granted I see why he didn’t win a MVP in past. Offensively he was limited, and wasn’t even the leader of his win team. You also have to take into account that he lost to LeBron James for the past two years and dude can ball. However, Dwight Howard significantly improved himself offensively while continuing his dominance on the defensive end. He carried a team that lived on 3 point shots and prayer to a top four seed in the playoff. He was top five in rebounds and blocks. He also finished 11th in points. Howard did all this while being saddled with the Orlando Magic (which included Vince Carter for 22 games, which alone is unbelievable).

Now if you still think Derrick Rose is the MVP, read the previous paragraph again.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

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Posted by on April 30, 2011 in Basketball

 

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Kobe Bryant’s Homosexual Slur Highlights One of Sports’ Biggest Problem


Let’s begin…

There’s something stuck in my crawl (crawl? Where is that?). So give me a minute to hop up on my soapbox.

Now I don’t know if you’ll know about what happened with Kobe Bryant. If you haven’t, let me fill you in.

During a game Kobe Bryant was issued a call by a referee that he didn’t agree with. He went into a tirade as all players do after a call they don’t agree with (or after any call if you’re Gary Payton). During Bryant’s tirade he screamed profanity and called the referee a homosexual slur that rhymes with Zagat (use your imagination boys and girls).

I waited to see the backlash surrounding Kobe‘s comments…and I waited and waited…there was nothing. All I heard were people defend Kobe Bryant and dismissing his comment. I even heard someone say (I’m not going to say who it is, but his name rhymes with Chris Webber) that, people are competitive and sometimes things slip. What…”Things slip” really? The lone voice that came out against Kobe was Charles Barkley on the Dan Le Batard Show (Purple Drank). So allow me to align myself with Mr. Barkley by saying, Kobe Bryant’s language was completely unacceptable. Please don’t try to excuse that kind of langue as something that always happens in a competitive arena. When you start using slurs, it’s no longer about competition. You are trying to hurt someone, and degrade them as an individual.

The word that Kobe Bryant used toward the referee was disgusting and abhorrent. There is no place for that use of language. I am shocked that people on sports television, that run their yap for a living, haven’t stood up for what is right. It seems that when the shoe is on the other foot, social activist seize the opportunity to promote themselves (“Paging Al Sharpton, Paging Al Sharpton”). We all know if Kobe was white and he called a referee a Nigger. People would try to kick him out of the country (“Oh here comes all Sharpton”).

Now I’m not saying Kobe’s a bad guy, because I don’t pass personal judgment on people I don’t know. What I will say is the reaction to Bryant’s comment speaks to a bigger problem in the American sports arena. There is a homophobic acceptance in sports, because of the lack of representation of openly homosexual men in American sports. Is this a problem? Yes and no. The lack of openly homosexual males isn’t a problem. People have the right to be whoever they want to be in their life. It’s no one’s duty to let the public in on their personal preferences. However, I do think that fact that sports culture hasn’t evolved into present day society is a problem. We have confronted and somewhat conquered racial inequality in sports. It’s time to address homophobia.

The recent Kobe Bryant comment has brought to fore front a huge problem in sports. I really hope we resolve the issue of homophobia in sports. It only takes one person to start the movement, so pardon me while I get Al Sharpton on the phone. I will tell him Don Imus is on line 2.

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

www.facebook.com/kshanecomedy

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KortneyShaneComedy@gmail.com

https://thekortneyshanepillar.wordpress.com/

 
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Posted by on April 19, 2011 in Basketball

 

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2011 NBA Season Lottery Teams Rankings, MVP, and Best Team


The Heat, Lakers, and Thunder Are All Powerhouse Teams

Let’s begin…

NBA Lottery Teams, Power Rankings

The rankings are based on a combination of quality of players, expectations, and how awful the team was. I’m ranking best outcome to worse outcome.

“This is it. Don’t get scared now.”

  1. L.A. Clippers: This was clearly the best lottery team this season. They toyed with the idea of making the playoffs while being just bad enough to make it into the lottery. Couldn’t have done it better myself.
  2. Houston Rockets: This is the arguably the best team in the lottery. They obviously have some holes to fill in the front court, but they have one of the best front offices in the NBA. They will be fine. Look for them to make the playoffs next year.
  3. Milwaukee Bucks: This is a playoff team that caught some bad breaks. Look for them to get back on track next season. “Fear the Dear”
  4. Phoenix Suns: This franchise is in denial. They should have started rebuilding 3 years ago after the Shaq experience. They have to get what they can for Steve Nash and cut bait with Vince Carter as soon as possible. Do it for the kids.
  5. Golden State Warriors: I don’t even know what to call this. I think it’s a basketball team, but I’m not sure what they’re trying to accomplish. I’m not sure they are even trying to win games, but I love this organization, because hands down they have the best fantasy players.
  6. Utah Jazz: After losing their two best players what could you reasonably expect. If you’re a Jazz fan just pray Jimmer Fredette is off the board before the Jazz make their pick.
  7. Minnesota Timberwolves: For the talent this team had they should have won a few more games. At the same time this is Minnesota. I’m not sure they know they still have a basketball team.
  8. Sacramento Kings: Welcome to the best high school team of all time. If John Calipari were a GM this is the team he would put together. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Kings end up having to vacate wins.
  9. Charlotte Bobcats: You changed coaches, traded away your best players, and Michael Jordan is your de facto GM. Other than that things are great.
  10. Washington Wizards: Your team stinks, but at least you have John Wall.
  11. Cleveland Cavaliers: “Damn” Nuff said
  12. Toronto Raptors: I know why this debacle happened, but did you have to wallow in the debacle?
  13. Detroit Pistons: I wanted to put Toronto last, but then I remembered that no one playing for the Pistons likes to organization. So I will jump off the ship with them.

My All NBA Team

C Dwight Howard

PF LaMarcus Aldridge

SF LeBron James

SG Dwyane Wade

PG Derrick Rose

I almost put Kevin Durant at shooting guard because he should be on this list.

2011 MVP

This belongs to Dwight Howard. I don’t want to hear about how Derrick Rose is so great. Look, dude isn’t even top five in the NBA (FYI top five: LeBron James, Dwight Howard, Kobe Bryant, Kevin Durant, and Dirk Nowitzki). Don’t get me wrong he’s a good player, but he is replaceable. On the other hand no one changes the game on both ends of the floor the way Dwight Howard does. He is the most dominate force in the NBA, and the MVP.

Best Team in the NBA

The Los Angeles Lakers are the best team. It may be seen as a copout, but they’re the best. The bottom line is they would be the favorite against every other team in the NBA. They have the best closer in Kobe Bryant, and the best coach in Phil Jackson. The Lakers should win the championship.

Season Synopsis

This has been the best regular season in recent history. I think it can spark another golden age in basketball, and I want to thank LeBron James (you’ll have to excuse me for a moment I just threw up in my mouth). James and the Miami Heat changed the way originations put their teams together. Now thanks to them we have powerhouse teams in big markets (the downside is terrible teams like Toronto ad Cleveland…just threw up in my mouth again).

There are 6 teams that have a legitimate shot at winning a championship. I can’t remember the last time that was the case. Wide open playoffs should make for some excitement.

“It’s Go Time!”

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

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Posted by on April 17, 2011 in Basketball

 

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New York Knicks and Carmelo Are 7-8. What Does It Mean?


The Knicks Look Like The Losers In The Melo Trade

Let’s begin…

“Hey New York! How’s that Melo saves the day thing working out?” I haven’t heard from you’ll lately. I know you’ll were once piece away from winning the championship. So, I’m wondering if Carmelo was that missing piece. Alright I will stop kicking Knicks fans in the groin, and begin my spiel.

Since Carmelo Anthony has left Denver. The Nuggets are 9-4 and the Knicks 7-8 (That’s less than .500 for the kids keeping count at home). Does this mean the Nuggets are better without Anthony? Not necessarily. It’s a small sample size, and it doesn’t indicate what a team truly is. With that being said the stat is an indicator of one important thing.

The fact that the Denver Nuggets are still trending in an upward direction indicates that Carmelo Anthony is not irreplaceable. Carmelo Anthony was overrated (I would like to take this time to say, “I saw this coming”). He is not in the class of LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Kobe Bryant, Kevin Durant, Derrick Rose, Dirk Nowitzki, Dwight Howard, or Deron Williams. He is a great scorer in the NBA, but he’s not someone that can carry a team. To put it in Big Boi terms, “He Ain’t No DJ.”

Now that doesn’t mean you can’t win with Carmelo Anthony. As a matter of fact you should win with Anthony. It means that if you plan on winning a championship (listen up New York. I’m about to drop some knowledge) you better lower your expectations, until you build pieces around him. Once the Knicks compensate for their lack of defensive intensity, they will be primed for a title run. However, that’s not New York’s biggest road block in route to a title. There biggest problems are the Lakers, Miami, Chicago, Oklahoma City, and any team Dwight Howard plays for.

As a Cavs fan I’m envious of Denver Nuggets. They didn’t give themselves the opportunity to get screwed by their superstar in free agency the way Cleveland did. At the same time Nuggets fan could be pissed off at the Cavaliers. If somehow LeBron never leaves Cleveland, then Denver would have had the upper hand on Carmelo, because he wanted the money more than anything. He can say it was about winning, but he wanted that money almost as much as Charlie Sheen wants another rail of blow (I say almost, because I’m not sure anyone wants anything more than Sheen wants blow).

There are now three models of how to unload your superstar in the NBA.

  • South Beach Style: Leave yourself open to the possibility of your franchise players walking when there contract is up.
  • Go Utah on it: Get out in front of the rumors, and trade your superstar a year before their contract is up.
  • Mile High Way: Wait for some team to become desperate and over pay for your superstar.

The Orlando Magic and New Orleans Hornets are paying special attention to these models. Which one will they pick?

 

-Kortney Shane Williams

Comedian and Writer

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Posted by on March 21, 2011 in Basketball

 

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Refire The Miami Heat Hype; Can The Orlando Magic Win It All?


Another Christmas, Another LeBron James Win

Let’s begin…

I knew it would happen if Miami beat L.A. on Christmas day. I knew writers would fuel it, because of the easy story line. I thought the Lakers would stop it dead in it’s tracks. What I didn’t know is the Lakers could care less about it.

“It” is the hype machine. Let’s refire it.

The stage was set for the main event on Christmas day. The Miami Heat vs. the L.A. Lakers in the Staples Center, The Heat 3 versus Kobe and the boys. The game started at 5 o’ clock, but I’m still waiting for the Lakers to show up (Maybe there on Isaiah Rider time and they’ll show some time in the second quarter next week). I would like to say the Lakers quit, but that would be giving them too much credit. They just no showed.

I have to give Miami credit. They won the game. They showed up, and dominated. I don’t remember them missing a jump shot. It was like watching Pleasantville (when everyone was black and white…I think I’ll stop with the lame movie references). They didn’t make any detrimental mistakes the entire game, which is surprising because Eric Dampier and Joel Anthony are on the team. I didn’t even know they could catch a basketball. I saw the look in their eyes and they were shocked too. So, big ups to the Heat.

With that being said my opinion on the Heat hasn’t changed. I think they’re top 3 in the Eastern Conference and a championship contender. That opinion isn’t changing until they win something.

The Magic Back To How They Were?

I was somewhat impressed with the Orlando Magic, but more with what they did before the game.

The Magic made two huge trades last week. They brought back Hedo Turkoglu, and acquired Gilbert Arenas. More importantly, they got rid of Vice Carter and Rashard Lewis. Vince Carter has never went to another team, and made it better. He has always made the team worse. (If you don’t believe me look it up). The problem with Vince is he always shrinks on the big stage, milks injuries (By the way he hasn’t played a game since the trade because of…wait for it…a knee injury), and mails in games all the time. He’s, just, puree (A saying I made famous in high school, which means no one but me knows of it). Vince Carter is everything you don’t want in a franchise player.

As for Rashard Lewis, dude is just over paid. If he were making less money he would have stayed in Orlando. At least he gets to go to D.C. It should be easier for him to get his steroids there.

With the trades Orlando made they publicly admitted they made a mistake. They should have paid Hedo (Even though he’s over paid), because of what he was to their team. He was the guy that step up in clutch moments and led the team to the finals. He even made Rashard Lewis look good. Turkoglu has always been big time, even going back to his days in Sacramento. I don’t have much to say about Gilbert. I just hope he doesn’t bring guns in the locker room, or take a dump in someone shoes. So, I give the Magic credit for rectify their mistake.

I think Orland has gotten back to what made them a good team. They have a clear franchise player in Dwight Howard (please see this on Dwight Howard), and a proven clutch performer in Hedo Turkoglu. The fact that they beat Boston says nothing. If you want to dissect it, you could say Rajon Rondo and Kendrick Perkins weren’t playing. You could also say Orlando beat and lost to Boston in the playoffs, so the game proves nothing. What I saw was a group of players that all knew their roles. That’s what got Orlando to the Finals two years ago, and they now have a chance to win a championship.

-Kortney Shane

Comedian and Writer

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Posted by on December 29, 2010 in Basketball, Sports

 

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